ockerw 发表于 2021-5-17 21:42   全显示 1楼
开头的小萝莉应该是为后面做铺垫吧，作者大大你是准备写中长篇吗，还有文中的妈妈沦陷也太快了吧，一点也不符合教师的职业。心理描写太浅了，感觉妈妈本身就是一个荡妇，太过于轻松就接受了儿子。文中的描写还是很好的，有社保的冲动，作者加油。


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  • xkwm001 金币 +5 认真回复，奖励！ 2021-5-17 22:40
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